Bedtime Talks 5

DSC_0403We have 3 kids and their voices come in small, medium and large. Our loud talker has been hurting our ears, running fast and living big since her first breath. Our quiet talker has a tender heart, a sweet spirit and his words are like gold to me, since I hear less of them. And then we have our “medium”. She’s a little of both. Her fits are loud, her sense of humor is spot on and she’s a perfect mix of her two older siblings.

So I go through my days, shushing one child, while trying not to break her wild and fun spirit and straining to hear the quieter child. Bedtime comes and I’m tired, but sometimes, when I make the right choice, I climb up the ladder into my son’s bunk bed. He straightens his pillows and covers, making the perfect spot for me. I nestle in and he puts  his arm around me. He talks…and talks…and talks….This time with him ends up being the best part of my day.

I go through my days rushing from one place to another. Some of my kids are great at spilling their hearts, while we’re on the go and others need stillness and silence. Whatever our kids need to be heard, that’s what we need to give them, yes?

As I lay up on that top bunk, I am sleepy and I can barely keep my eyes open. I sort of want bedtime to be over, but that connection? Well, it’s priceless. Connection is a developed feeling and if I rushed through all of our days, not slowing down enough to really hear my kids, over time, they would get used to not being heard and before too long, they’d believe that their voices didn’t matter. What if we trained our children to feel that being heard is important and that their words and feelings are valuable?DSC_0934What if we started bedtime earlier so we have enough time to climb into their beds and listen?

So, why do I share all of this? Well, because I’m guessing that if I have a quiet child, you might too and like me, I’m guessing you want to hear them…..And like me, you probably sometimes just want bedtime to be over. 

How about we as a community encourage each other to slow down, lay next to them and listen.

Do you have a quieter child? How do you connect best with them?DSC_0894Brand-Ambassador-2A big thank you to The Patchery, for allowing me to be an ambassador and for the opportunity to design the shirt pictured above for my son. It’s his new favorite! To design a unique piece of clothing, perfect for play, outings, church and everything in between, be sure to visit The Patchery’s website. When you order, use the code HealthyMama15 to receive 15% off your total order! (excludes gift cards)

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About Angela Strand

Angela is a wife, mama to three little ones and a lifelong Washington State resident. Besides facilitating the NW Healthy Mama website, she loves being involved in her kids' school, hiking with her girlfriends, growing all the things, writing, reading and taking photos.

5 thoughts on “Bedtime Talks

  • Gina

    I have 2 girls. One is an outie and one is an innie. My outie talks all. Day. Long. About everything. The good, the bad, and the ugly. My innie doesn’t talk much at all, but she will come sit with me and be quiet. Today I needed her to know something, so while we were alone in the car I told her we were going to have an awkward conversation. She didn’t talk, but she listened. And she agreed. And I think she is avoiding me now. Maybe tomorrow she will come sit with me again. And hopefully, I made my point and she will know that she can talk to me any time she really needs to.

    • Angela Strand Post author

      I love the way you said “outie and innie”. That makes so much sense and I’ve never heard it described that way before. I hope she comes and sits with you tomorrow…..and I bet she will. 🙂

  • Connie

    There are so many things that I learned having our grandchildren with us for two years. One of them was nighttime talks! Every night they each got a five minute back scratch and conversation. Surprisingly, it made bedtimes so much calmer, enjoyable and built a relationship I’ll never get over.

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