I listen to women talk and I can’t help but notice how many are apologizing for what they love, saying they’re sorry when they’re sticking with their gut feeling and acting unworthy when they try to make time for what they enjoy. Why is this and how can we make it stop? Women have the gift of intuition. We were created with unique ideas and inside our core and deep in our hearts, we usually know what’s best for our kids. But still…..we apologize too much and speak out quietly, holding back our words when someone asks us what we love or what we’re good at.
Currently, I’m in a particularly difficult season with our 3 year old. With each of our kids, 3 has been the hardest age so, I’m rolling with it, but still- I find myself feeling like I should apologize if I need to leave a playdate early or stick with my word. I’m embarrassed when I carry my fit-throwing child from the car, inside our home to give her lunch because she is HANGRY, instead of chatting with a neighbor. I get insecure when I’m afraid I’ll miss out on something, even though I know my kids need a less hurried life. So it’s time for a gut check and time stop apologizing so much. It’s time to do what we know is best and do it with confidence.
Here are 7 Things to Not Apologize for When You Have Little Ones:
- Sticking to your word. Say you’re on the way home, kids are tired and grumpy and you’ve just told them that when you get home, it’s lunch and then rest time. Then your phone rings and a friend wants to do something. This friend is awesome and you’d love to hangout, but your Mama gut is telling you to stick to your word, for if you don’t melt-down city is sure to happen. Real friends will understand this. Reschedule and be the Mama who does what she says she’s going to do.
- Saying no to activities. It’s hard when it seems like everyone is doing everything. While there’s nothing wrong with this, some of us get really grumpy when we have too much on our plate. Here’s to finding the freedom to say no.
- Planning things when you NEED some Mama-only time. So you’re about to go crazy because you need some time alone. Plan it. What scares me is how much guilt Moms are walking around with. You don’t need be everything to everyone. Make a point to do something that makes your heart happy!
- Leaving a playdate early. Kids are throwing a fit? You’re feeling exhausted? Leave early. It’s okay!
- Doing what works best for YOU. So you like to schedule naps or maybe you want to nurse and co-sleep until your child self-weans. As long as you’re really happy with it, do what works for your family and do it proudly. God made you the Mom to your babies for a reason.
- Being fiercely protective of your kids. While other kids are having sleepovers and walking around the store alone, you’re feeling like so many of the common things that kids do are in the FAR off distance for your family, or maybe never. You’re fiercely protective and it’s working for you. Never, ever apologize for this.
- Not being able to keep up with social media. Oh my gosh. This one. Awhile back, I realized that I couldn’t keep up with it all and you guys, I actually felt bad! There are so many people I enjoy following, but I can not keep up. Since then, I’ve let this go. Social media is fun, but it’s not worth the addiction and our kids need our EYES. Don’t feel bad if you can’t keep up with it all.
True JOY in motherhood comes when we surrender comparisons and boldly live the way we were created to be. Here’s to less apologizing and more enjoying.